Changing our Patterns of Behavior
Behavior Patterns: Creating lasting change
Limitied beliefs result in limitied lives. Free the mind from limitation and embrace your True Self.
To creating lasting changes in behavior patterns, we must first get at the root of the problem and then use ongoing awareness and discernment to continue making healthy choices. The way to get to the root is by clearing our negative self-image and limiting beliefs. Understanding Judgment vs Discernment helps us stay on the right path.
It is essential to release our limiting beliefs. We must clear these thoughts away before we can experience and know our True Identity. However, we must also consciously integrate our healing and transformation into our behavior and become conscious when old patterns start to re-emerge as the result of the triggering of new egoic pockets.
In this section one idea will be presented at a time. It is suggested that you consciously work with this insight for a week or two before moving on to a new idea.
Judgment vs Discernment
Judgment is a function performed by the ego-mind. The Whole-mind is incapable of judgment. So, when we judge we lose our Whole-minded, God connection. We trade this for whatever ego benefits we might get like: feeling superior, being angry, hating and its accompanying excitement, getting to feel separate and therefore seemingly safe, etc..
Judgment occurs when we confuse a person or ourselves with an action that the ego is engaged in. For example: we might have been told or have said, “You’re a bad boy or girl for doing that.” Or, we might think he or she is a terrible person because they are a cheat, a thief, or a drug addict.
Judgment occurs when we look at something or ourselves and react against it based on our past. This might include: excess weight, skin color, dress, riches or poverty, personal beliefs, etc.. In these cases we are projecting our egoic prejudices and reacting to our own limiting beliefs. We have gotten lost in the form and failed to see the real person who stands behind the form like a light bulb stands behind a lampshade. We have looked with our mind rather than our heart and as a result we have lost our connection to Source, and therefore what is really valuable.
Discernment, however, is not of the ego. It says, “This person (or myself) is engaged in a behavior in which I don’t wish to participate. I can still love you or myself and not participate in the behavior. I separate you from the behavior. I see not a bad person but a person engaged in something I don’t wish to be part of. I don’t even have to conclude that you shouldn’t be part of it. I could hold the thought that I am not able to tell if this action will, in the long run, aid or harm your growth. But, I know that for myself it is not what I want.
Discernment says, “I don’t choose this, but I love you.” Spiritually, we are not required to like or change anyone, just Love everyone. As we grow and transform we must discern. We must let our inner guidance tell us what to do and what to avoid. This is not judgment. This is discernment and it must occur. Do not back away from this out of fear that you are becoming judgmental.
Summary: I can Love and be happy or I can judge and be separate, but I cannot do both at the same time. Discernment allows us to Love and still navigate in the world.
Thank you. I look forward to sharing this article with my 20yr old son with whom I have been having an ongoing discussion about the difference between judgment and discernment. Your relevant article provides such clarity; I especially like the summary statement!